
Hi Everyone,
It’s been quite a while since I have written anything. I have gone through a gamut of emotions and thoughts. I have had a lot of different experiences.
I have needed a long break and physically writing is very hard on my hands and fingers.
When we entered the year 2020, we all knew it would be a different year. None of us including officials could be prepared for COVID-19. Oh, did you think I wouldn’t bring it up? It’s been all of our experience hoping for it to pass.
It’s been the marking of an end of eras for many people and saying goodbye to many people who have made our world go around. Some have lost loved ones. Who, where, what, do we blame?
Talks of a new normal, is now normal. What does that look like? How do we reconcile our faith and hope? Do our dreams count anymore?
I realize this post may be all over the map and hard to follow. So is life these days.
I basically took a week off of Facebook except I did check in once or twice, once was just get a picture saved in my albums. I wish I could say it was enough for me to have felt grounded. On the other hand, I know it was good for me.
I want to start limiting my time more on Facebook on a regular basis and go back to remembering why it was so great to reconnect. I want to grow as a person who is more than just a human being and is spiritual.
I am not there by a long shot. I know myself to be too selfish. I am one who bought toilet paper to last 2-3 months at a time when I could. I started running out around stay at home orders. This has been difficult knowing I can no longer do this.
I am trying as of today, to catch up to people. Just in short bits is all I can really handle, and that is on me. I am the one with the problem.
My wonderful therapist has been asking about the writer. He is wonderful, really. I don’t always take direction, but I should. I need to press through the difficulty and remain grateful. I am finding that hard to do.
It is hard to keep writing because I do want a positive spin on everything but that’s not how it is in living it out. I am trying to get there in my own way and definitely on my own terms!
Trigger warning for cuss phrases: I say WTF out loud and to myself probably 20 times in one day, maybe more.
Life is a lot like that poppet game; where you pound the ground hogs with a hammer game at fairs and what not. You pop one problem and they keep coming in. You get to accept a new normal for the day and here’s a dozen more all at once. I mean WTF?
Okay I am done with cussing for the moment. But here’s the thing, it doesn’t serve me well. My blood pressure rises and I am to a point of screaming. I can’t even blame that on my growing up or parents. I think I may have come out of the womb that way.
Some questions now might be as a follow up:
1.What are you doing to take care of yourself?
2. How are you sleeping?
3. How are you eating?
4. What exercises are helping you?
5. Are you really taking quiet time or are you just day dreaming and whistling in the dark?
6. What are you doing to help someone else?
7. Are you taking precautions for covid-19?
8. What areas have you improved on in your life?
9. What areas in your life need work?
10. Will you hold on for one more day?
11. How much hope do you have?
12. What’s one positive thing you love about yourself?
These 12 questions are important for you to answer to yourself and maybe discuss with someone else. All kidding and jokes aside. They also could point to you needing someone to talk to professionally.
I personally will be pondering these questions for the next few days and see how honest I can answer these questions. I plan to discuss them even in my circle of friends and therapist.
Here’s your challenge to getting to be the best version of you possible, just for today.
Thanks for reading!
This has been another blog post entry by Boxcar Mike over and out!
God Bless Y’all Everybody!








