2022

Egg Salad, Bacon, And Tomato With Some Weirdness

/ boxcarmike / Leave a comment
Egg Salad, Bacon, and Mater Sandwich – 2022

Hey, Y’all!

It is good to be here writing and hopefully, it will all upload amid the global sporadic Spectrum Internet!

I have yet to do a new YouTube video. It has been a weird busy week.

I have had plenty to fill my time. I feel way off schedule and behind on several chores and my current project of making my place livable just for me and not having to take the home health nurses in mind. I do hope to have the carpet shampooed by this evening. As it is going on midnight as I write this now.

My friend brought over several Keto meals and snacks for me. What a surprise blessing that is for me. I am thinking I may show these in the video coming up.

I did make an egg salad sandwich with a slice of tomato. I also made the chili for that night and lunch the next day. Most of it I put in the freezer.

I was too tired to remember to photograph the chili, but it was incredibly good, and I will enjoy it again soon.

Health-wise, I am going once a week to the wound clinic for dressing changes and feel good about it so far. I also have a nurse coming once a week to take my vitals and fill my meds. This helps me with the tedious task of filling a medicine box and is an enjoyable time to visit and have human interaction.

I do have most of the gadgets necessary for my vitals. This helps the nurse quite a bit.

I never did finish this entry and I am going to attempt to do that now. I had hoped to have this finished for Thursday. That did not work out and Friday I ended up going by ambulance to the hospital which I will address in a separate entry.

I did however make it home by Friday evening but the rest of Friday and most of Saturday found me light-headed. I am feeling better.

This last week has been a weird week as far as scheduling and getting daily tasks completed.

As I enter the new week, my question to myself is the same as usual. What is it that I am willing to do differently?

The answer is, for me to just do what is in front of me and get my head out of the clouds.

I get sidetracked, by letting myself think about other things as I am doing my best to complete a task.

While I do want to keep changing and doing things differently, I am also doing what I can to change the scenery that surrounds me.

I hope to complete half of the Thursday and Friday lists for this last week today, and tomorrow. The days’ work does mount up, especially when you get behind.

Friday knocked the wind out of my sails. I learned you can backward in everything you strive for, zero to sixty. It gets better, it gets worse, and it gets different.

Thanks for reading!

This has been another blog post entry by Boxcar Mike, over and out!

God Bless Y’all Everybody!

As Far As It Depends Upon Me

/ boxcarmike / Leave a comment
Banana Bread Loaf August 8th, 2022.

Hey, Y’all!

Today I just got a banana bread loaf put in the oven. I am also going to do an egg salad with bacon and a sandwich with a slice of tomato. I am going to do some chili much later today some for this week and some to freeze.

I finally tried the donut shop coffee pods. I fell in love with a medium roast coffee because I am usually for Darker Roast Columbian-style Coffee or French Dark Roast Coffee.

In other news, I am still rearranging only a bit of my office/living room area. I have a picture to move and supplies to move to the bedroom out of the way. I am happier thinking of only myself in this arranging business.

Sometimes you must make a bigger mess of things to get it right.

When the banana bread loaf comes out of the oven, we should have a slice with butter and a cup of hot coffee. I want to enjoy a piece and bask in the time I have alone. In enough time before my helper comes in to clean and do errands.

I am hoping for most chores and myself to be in order.

So now back to hopefully in a bit of having that banana bread and coffee, I want to think about all the things that are dependent on me. I want to think about what is dependent upon me for more peace in my life. What is dependent upon me to be able to pack into the stream of life?

I think the only way to be emotionally in tune is to tune our spirituality. I manage people and circumstances a lot better when I take the time to be with myself and God. I need that time even if it is only a minute or two before a tough situation or confrontation. If it is a confrontation I know today, if possible, I need to ask for time to table the conversation so that I can get alone and be mindful and seek out help to be able to come back to the table. I realize many times that is an impossible request, and it is an immediate situation. This is where the pause and deep breaths come in when I think to follow that direction.

I am finding when I hear myself saying good things, I say aloud, “Michael, I hope you are listening to yourself.” Because often these things are unexpected from nowhere. It is shocking to hear myself sometimes because of being emotionally and spiritually screwed up for years.

My life has calmed down a whole lot over the years and I have mellowed out some. It has taken over 56 years to get to this point in life. It is a case of sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly, and often slowly.

The banana bread just finished. It is just in time for a break after this entry gets published. Piping hot from the oven cooling down just enough so it separates the sides from the loaf pan. Then a slice with a gob of butter melting on it with my cup of hot coffee.

Let me close by sharing the prayer of St Francis of Assisi:

Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi (Prayer for Peace)

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace:
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
where there is sadness, joy.
O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console,
to be understood as to understand,
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

As far as it depends upon me let there be peace.

Thanks for reading!

This has been another blog post entry by Boxcar Mike, over and out!

God Bless Y’all Everybody!

Hard Times Are Here Harder Times Coming

/ boxcarmike / Leave a comment
Park Hills 2022

Hey, Y’all!

It is Sunday, August 7th, 2022. I write about some complaints, self-betterment, recovery, spirituality, religion, cooking, and enjoying life. I do not just stick to those topics, or I will not be sticking to only those topics.

I think all topics should be fair game. We are in a world full of changes politically, religiously, economically, and with real-life hard struggles.

Some have no understanding we are in the middle of a crisis that is coming. Yet for some of us, that time is here. If you are on a fixed income, it is here. Getting groceries anymore is an emotional time for me.

I am having to decide what I can do without each month and how to preserve and stock up at the same time. DO NOT TAKE THIS AS ME ASKING FOR HANDOUTS. I am not!

This is a time to stay busy and I should have started even a year ago or more. Hindsight is 20/20. I know today it is not just me. Soon a lot more will be facing these circumstances. We are learning that our dollar will not stretch. It is not worth much at all,

I am trying to keep my electric bill down to $60 a month. It is particularly challenging at times. I will keep reminding people we need to be prepared and do everything to save.

This entails learning new skills, stocking up on supplies, changing our entertainment, and doing what we can for ourselves so others can take care of themselves. I also believe in helping others and I do that as well. It is about sharing what we have and building community.

Do your homework. Find trusted news sources. Go over your budget and check out your insurance find someone to explain the legal jargon you can trust. Make changes, as necessary.

Find out what you would do if no electricity or water. Those times are coming, it is a fact.

I have shared I watch preppers, cooks, farmers, homesteaders, auto mechanics, and different people. We cannot just keep going with our heads in the sand!

I am grateful for the knowledge I am gleaning. It would be a lot different if only a handful are saying we are heading for a depression! It is not that way.

You do not like leftovers? Well, that may change soon, or you will learn to take a dish and make it a few separate ways. Some of these people are saying some of us will not make it. I have no reason to doubt that.

However even being late in the game and seeing price hikes looming over us if we take heed now, we may have a chance.

Meals in themselves may look different. It may not be three sides an entrée and a dessert. It may be an entrée with vegetables in it. That is if we are lucky to have anything!

Some people may have supplies stocked up and have things under control. Most people I know are living paycheck to paycheck if they even have an income of any type.

However, on a lighter note, I am in the middle of rearranging my living room/office once more. I am finally getting to arrange my space as if nurses will not be coming in from now on.

I am hoping in some ways, this is a new chapter. I hated having medical supplies having to be a focal point in easy care for me. They were taking over spaces I meant for other decorations.

This way my arrangements are about my space for me, rather than having to take visiting nurses into consideration for every move. It will take some tweaking, I am sure.

I am making chili this week some to have and some to freeze.

I hope to get another YouTube video up and again, I hope to be consistent here.

Thanks for reading!

This has been another blog post entry by Boxcar Mike, over and out!

God Bless Y’all Everybody!

Happy Thanksgiving In July Yes, That’s Right!

/ boxcarmike / Leave a comment
BoxcarMike on Youtube August 4th,2022

Hey, Y’all!

I am here roasting a turkey in the oven. I have sanitized the kitchen and taking the time to write a little something.

It feels like I am caught up despite oversleeping. I have a couple of deliveries of over-the-counter products coming from my insurance which will help in things normally I would have to budget for or go without.

Life is constantly dealing with these insignificant things which are in the middle of a routine that takes the energy of planning.

You know you must continue in your day by praying and hoping everything turns out well.

The hardest struggle is with self and knowing your attitude must improve to tolerate others. I do want to love other people, but it just seems as much as I can feel unlovable, so do other people.

I know others might even just consider me a grumpy middle-aged man.

In many ways, I still feel like the sixteen-year-old boy trying to figure out the ways of this world and wondering when I got older characteristics, that to me should not be that noticeable to other people and yet, they are noticeable to others anyway.

I am finishing this blog entry from the other day I started on Thursday, July 21st, 2022. It is now Monday, July 25th, 2022.

I was not caught up on my day Thursday, and I was near a melt-down mode trying to finish the turkey and stuffing. The turkey turned out great! The stuffing was a Keto-Gluten-Free recipe, and it turned out great!

I had two different friends over, one on Thursday, who provided the turkey to cook and all the ingredients I needed for the recipes. I had another friend who enjoyed a second supper on Friday, who provided our drinks. I had a wonderful time with both people. My weekend was restful and just unwinding from the week. I wanted everything to go perfect. While everything tasted good the presentation of the turkey-looking appetizing was a major failure.

However, the most important part to me was the safety of the turkey cooked all the way. Also, so no one is sick due to carelessness or unsafe practices in cooking.

On a personal note, each person in their way added to my memory for my dad, on what would have been his birthday.

As for today Monday, it is another day of being ready to keep on the move with a shower, a hot cup of coffee, and my morning phone call.

I look forward to each morning’s phone call with a trusted friend.

I am starting to run behind schedule. I will finish this entry after lunch.

It turns out, that my Thanksgiving lasted only a short term. I became bewildered over insurance issues and medical issues. It has taken about two weeks for me to climb back up from the depression I fell into.

I feel like the ground below may not crumble after all. As of this past Monday, I confronted a problem head-on to get the insurance and medical issues straightened out hopefully in effect for the beginning of September.

I am sorry this took so long to finally get this blog entry posted. Today I did upload a video of my rambling out a message to viewers. Please look at it here https://youtu.be/ioGWCqoUQwI and as always, thank you.

This has been another blog post entry by Boxcar Mike, over and out!

God Bless Y’all Everybody!

The Truths Of Your Shortomings To Get Past Them

/ boxcarmike / Leave a comment
Leadington, Missouri July 19th, 2022

Hey, Y’all!

I am here again today using my life experience along my journey in what it takes to get things done. In my experience, I must call out the truth of my shortcomings to myself, God, and a trusted person.

If I can call out the truth, then it can help me get past whatever it is and do what I need to do for that day. Each day is a new challenge and sometimes repetitiveness happens. Regardless, I must get things done. I cannot have a bunch of half-done things and rest well. I am not sure anyone rests when things are half-done

Like it or not there is a routine in my mind, and I try to put it on paper daily. I check off each item as I complete it. I also have a digital and I have my physical calendar, to look at and mark off each day and the main events with a big X.

Every day feels like a time management process. If I do not have things written or printed out, I end up spinning my wheels, wasting time when I could get it done, and feeling as though I can rest, at the end of the day.

I am picking back up here now, Wednesday Morning. Yesterday was a day unto itself. I had an eye doctor appointment, so I could get my eyes evaluated for new glasses. I am far-sighted and thankfully only a little worse.

Getting back to the subject of calling myself out on my shortcomings. It is important so that I can be okay. This morning I had a conversation with someone about the power of letter writing as well. I thought to myself as we hung up, I need to write a letter to myself and figure out where I am going.

I cannot stay, and not move. I must keep growing and improving on where I want to go and who I want to be.

It is a continuous journey once we decide to let go of the stuff that holds us back from self-betterment and or growing into the person we want. I know I am created for more than I am now.

Thanks for reading!

This has been another blog post entry by Boxcar Mike, over and out!

God Bless Y’all Everybody!

Coffee Time On A Way Too Early Saturday

/ boxcarmike / Leave a comment
Heading Out To Bismarck Lake 2018

Hey, Y’all!

I am still waking up even if I have been up since 5:30 am.

Norman Greenbaum, Red Bone, The Eagles, and me. I love my music.

I have been thinking about changes and what it all means since last evening. You can feel resistance from those around you when you are in the middle of making changes or doing what you need to for self-care.

You must keep moving and keep changing regardless. Someone wise says you wish those people well, pray, and hope the best for them. God love them.

What I do love is the ones from your tribe show up. They remind you that you are on the right path. My friend showed up with a turkey we are going to thaw that baby out and cook it this next week. I am looking forward to that because I am going to bake the turkey with a keto stuffing recipe.

I went searching for a turkey recipe a couple of months ago and did come across it. I do want to be healthier. I am not always willing to put in the work for it, but somehow there is always a way out.

I do not have to entertain anyone else’s insanity today. My excuses for my choices are more than enough to deal with on most days. I must answer for me and me alone.

How we answer for ourselves comes in all forms. There are a lot of days my door is open too much. Believe me, Friday comes, and I want that door closed. I want to keep out as much nonsense as possible.

It looks like a lot of loneliness but not so much anymore. It is freedom. I have learned that if you stop stuff at your door then you only contend with what is inside of you. That is more than enough for me to contend with most days.

Have I mentioned the month is slipping by? This means the year is slipping by as well. I am not even close to all that I had hoped to accomplish this summer. Maybe surviving and stopping the insanity in part is what I was meant to accomplish. There is always more to do. There is always more revealed.

I am stronger emotionally, spiritually, and physically. A week ago, I thought it was about explaining that to others. This week I realize it is more about explaining that to myself. The fact is I still need others.

I cannot do this alone, but there are more things I can do without supervision.

I of course need guidance overall. To me, it is a mixture of many different things. Life is not at all the black and white solid force of nature. Life has a lot of grey areas. There are absolutes and I am still finding my way through both of those.

I am not the person to tell you, you are wrong. Your way may work for you. That does not mean your way works for me, nor my way works for you.

Saturday and Sunday both slipped by, so I am posting now on Monday.

Thanks for reading!

This has been another blog post entry by Boxcar Mike, over and out!

God Bless Y’all Everybody!

3 Statements I Am Sorry I Am Wrong I Apologize

/ boxcarmike / Leave a comment
Park Hills, Missouri 2022.

Hey, Y’all!

I am back at behaviors and responses today! It is a forever battle for me.

I keep working on everything. I juggle all the things set before me my schedule my behavior as an afterthought of acting without thinking. After I say words in not a nice tone, I have that thought of wow! That was harsh!

The people in my corner are the best! Given this world and how selfish people are all wrapped up in themselves not caring where others are or doing anything to put back and replenish what they have taken. I would like to think I am not one of those selfish people.

I have the mindset of realizing I need to ease up and not be ready to chew off the heads of the very people, helping me get through in this life. It makes me think I do not have the right to ask them for forgiveness because it has happened all too often.

To me, and I could be wrong for thinking this, the most valued statements are I am sorry, I am wrong, and I apologize.

Life is hard enough without lashing out among those around us. It does not matter if you are stressed out. What matters is how I treat others and knowing I would want to be treated by others, with more kindness and grace. Especially when people are seeing a problem you do not see.

I have mellowed through the years, but this does not mean I have arrived at any goal. I have more to work on in managing my emotions and in responding to others.

It is my goal to keep working and improving my social interactions with people. It is a priority for me to let others know they have value. Not to get stuff from people, but to grow together and interact. To have the understanding we are imperfect people, in an imperfect world, living in peace and harmony.

There are impressive ideas about handling each other with care. Great posters with sayings and beautiful artwork with rules to live by. Yet if we act and live those things out. That is when they are most beautiful. When the words come to life, that is when it is beautiful, true, and pure.

We relate a lot of things to having a garden, a gas tank, and a cup. A garden takes time to plant and harvest. In between is watering and weeding. A gas tank refers to the energy we spend on what is important to us. The cup refers to in many ways the blessings we receive or the happiness and joy we have inside of ourselves.

Thinking upon all these references to behaviors and treatment people get in response from us, there is always better and more to give to these people.

I do desire to give the people in my corner the best. We will never give people what they deserve, but we can strive toward it.

Thanks for reading!

This has been another blog post entry by Boxcar Mike, over and out!

God Bless Y’all Everybody!

The Adult Has To Play Well With Others

/ boxcarmike / Leave a comment
My Peace Lily Hoping To Get Another

Hey, Y’all!

Sometimes I know exactly what I am going to say in my post before I get it out. I just never know the ending or what it will look like at the end. I am just as surprised as you most of the time. It is like, who knew?

Did any of you all your mama say, “I am surprised at you?”

Mine did, I would respond with, I know me too! Not a good thing to say back. I am just saying.

In the last few posts, they have all been random. This one is no different.

Playing well with others was never a true statement for me. I loved to do my own thing. I still do in fact.

I find out doing my own thing after Friday nights and well even though the week, once I turn my phone off for the night, I have a lot more peace.

I did not even think this weekend through it just happened naturally. I took an extra day of rest. I felt guilty for a second. I then realized I must extend my hours for the next few months because I have a nurse, Nurse B. (Her name starts with B for real), and she is not a morning person.

You roll with punches, I guess. I will be done with my day at 6:30 pm. Fridays I will be finished with the day by 4:00 pm. Of course, that does not apply to my friends. If we have made plans, all the better.

I needed the extra rest today. I am supposed to be at an event online at this very moment and have my phone open. My plans changed. These things happen.

I know that the event is downloadable and will get to it at my earliest convenience. There was also a second event I had to say no to at the same time. I am hoping it will be downloadable or at least a stream online as well later. If not, oh well.

My neighbor friends have been missing me and at some point, I do need to be available for them as well. I do love them and care about them.

It is not just for the nurse I had to extend my hours it is also because I have had to schedule transportation for an eye doctor’s appointment next week. They could call anytime this week to confirm the appointment and confirm the time they are picking me up for the appointment.

I promised one neighbor a cake and I will make that tonight and have that ready for her in the morning.

I have yet to make supper, but I did get extra rest. It is just going to be a light supper, I think.

Here is a clue for someone out there asking, who is going to help me?

No one is coming. I have made a promise to love, care, protect, feed, and do what I must to keep myself at peace and in harmony with my surroundings. No one will do that for me.

The only thing coming is the wolves. I must keep them away from my door at all costs.

As a friend says, stay busy. Never forget where you came from.

Thanks for reading!

This has been another blog post entry by Boxcar Mike, over and out!

God Bless Y’all Everybody!

Preparing Myself By Taking Responsibility For Upcoming Events

/ boxcarmike / Leave a comment
Bismarck, Missouri 2018

Hey, Y’all!

I am back writing again today. Yesterday, I wrote about current affairs in the world and being prepared for a world crisis. Every part of life has to do with being prepared and can help lower the anxiety that arises. It is taking the responsibility for our lives.

I explained yesterday I am on disability. This means I am on a limited income. This means my budget only allows for so much in supplies and to cover my needs. The warning I gave out to watch and be prepared is about learning to live without some luxuries.

Life is hard and there is much we can do to make it a little bit easier by being prepared.

I listen to people on various platforms. I listen to farmers, preppers, homesteaders, pastors, cooks, truckers, few but also some people in politics. I try to tune out of the news as much as possible. However, like most curiosity gets to me. I refuse to watch any daily news on television.

My writing takes different tangents depending upon where I am daily.

I do write a lot on recovery, and spirituality. Since Covid19 there has been a lot of turmoil. I write a lot about where I am with routine and how important it is to me to not go backward in my basic physical, emotional, and spiritual healing. It all boils down to my journey.

Taking the responsibility for my journey which is my life. I do not wait for people to call me out on the things I may fail in. It is more important for me to recognize and take the responsibility for correcting my actions as much as I can.

Swallowing the hard chunks of truth about myself and using the people in my circle to bounce stuff on, and hear their experience, strength, and hope.

I want to keep moving in my journey and not stay stuck. To surround me in more healthy ways and try new and diverse ways. To learn to be more open-minded and not think my ways are the only ways. If no one can tell you anything, chances are you are going to get stuck and stay stuck. This drives me nuts and keeps me depressed and is no longer an option for me.

In my journey, I have learned how to make things easier by organizing and stopping hoarding. Stocking up a pantry of food and supplies is not the same thing as hoarding. When you learn to throw away things and get rid of things that are supposed sentimental.

Learning to clean up after every mess is important. Cleaning as you go stops a lot of catastrophes and messes.

Planning stops a lot of headaches. Planning for me is starting each day with a prayer and meditation. Make my phone calls and have both my physical calendar and my digital calendar. Making my gratitude list and list of things to do each day.

Staying on top of medications is just as important as breathing.

Meal planning takes effort if you have it packaged correctly and taking up less space it makes it a lot easier.

Making and keeping my boundaries has proven to be challenging for me. But it is an important part of not having a short fuse in dealing with others. I find myself more taking breaths and stating my needs at moments. Sometimes it is learning to laugh so you have an extra breath before you sound too serious or demanding.

That is not to say you might not have to keep repeating the same statement in a direct serious tone. These are serious times with plenty of stress.

For others to respect your time, space, boundaries, and things you must respect them first. This I have learned on a summary of all these things I have mentioned. Still, I must keep practicing as well. No one has it all down.

It is continuous learning and practicing. This is me staying busy. It is time for lunch!

Thanks for reading!

This has been another blog post entry by Boxcar Mike, over and out!

God Bless Y’all Everybody!

Making Choices And Keeping The Wolves Away

/ boxcarmike / Leave a comment

Where part of my childhood was left behind.

Victoria, Missouri 2016 (Desoto)

Hey Y’all,

Here we are continuing to move forward with the rising inflation in everything that is affecting us as common people. If you are anything like me trying to live on a slim budget, you are constantly making choices on what you can have and not have.

It comes down to what you eat, cleaning, laundry, and of course the extras in any kind of entertainment or technology to stay current. I am grateful for the help I do have, Though, at times I have wanted to wish away the help, not realizing I could be shooting myself in the foot.

I did the monthly shopping yesterday rather; I had a helper do it with my list. I did a guestimate of prices and was close. I went over the guestimate by $15.00. The remaining balance forces choices for what is available for the rest of the month.

On my social media, I have hinted around to the fact that farmers, preppers, truckers, and even the Chief of The United Nations, have warned of global food shortages are coming. Some people might be calling these alarmists or fear-mongering people.

We are amid the beginning of it especially when things are missing off the store shelves. Stores can make their shelves look full. What happens is, that you start being unable to find the same product you usually buy.

As a country, we have not had it this financially probably since The Great Depression. One of my favorite people says that is exactly what we are soon to be in for another, Great Depression. It is past time to take heed to that.

We had close calls in the first part of Covid19, and yet most of us only had a taste of what was like. Many lost jobs, incomes, homes, and their very lives due to Covid19 and the effects of the disease.

I am on disability and yet healing beyond what I was a year ago, thankfully!

I did not get to start my garden or even collect the things I thought I might do to try to learn water-bath canning. It was a hope and believed I could pull it all together.

I am very eager to learn, but not all the things could I get together. In part, I am learning I am more eager than the actual work of it all is in my ability.

What is in my ability is to stock my fridge, freezer, and pantry. I cook all my meals at home. I do not go out to eat unless a friend has come by to get me to go out. In most cases, I prefer my cooking over any fast food, restaurants, take-out, or delivery. However, I am human like anyone else, and a break from the kitchen is most welcomed.

That said, I have gotten, and I hate most people going into my kitchen because they in most cases are not going to prepare my meal or treat my pots and pans right. I am demanding in my kitchen I want things done a certain way.

When I was ill, I could endure a lot of things. Burned cheeseburgers, and messed-up omelets, were all acceptable. I love a burned cheeseburger.

Here is the real issue. It is stocking up the pantry with spam peanut butter, and canned meats, vegetables, and fruits of any kind. Having sugar, flour, salt, baking powder, baking soda, vanilla, instant coffee, creamer, tea, water, hygiene stuff toilet paper, and cleaning supplies.

If you think you have enough for one or two months, you do not have enough. Are you going to be able to have all your extras that are must-haves? Nope!

The wolves are coming to the door, and you need to be prepared stocked up, and ready to protect what is yours. Hey, this does not mean stopping helping one another and living in a community.

We just need to be prepared. It is past time, and we are on borrowed time to get it done already! Let us get it done and be prepared.

Thanks for reading!

This has been another blog post entry by Boxcar Mike, over and out!

God Bless Y’all Everybody!