To Thine Own Self Be True Always

Hi Everyone!

Today was a rather busy day. I first had to deal with medical and physical issues the first half of the day. It was one of those mornings where it was hard to get up on time. But I trudged through today.

I still read in my book. However, I feel it more important to share about my day, along the journey. Part of recovery is building friendships and being open to allow the day to unfold as it will. The friendship and fellowship are all part of staying connected.

I was so blessed today in a few ways just sharing with others in person. Being clean and sober is so much better when you can honestly share with others. We get to share and be as open as we want. I find sharing everything from the gut and where we honestly stand now, is so helpful in a way to remember to be grateful.

Once you have a few 24 hours under your belt you can even see in yourself some growth just by sharing. When you’re not down in the dumps and you can find that gratitude, you learn that you can be happy and celebrate with others, in their growth as well.

In the near half day mark, I took time to share with my driver and friend. Maybe I should say he took the time more so. It did help clarify things and though this person may not necessarily be at the gatherings, just having that human contact is helpful.

When I got sober the saying used to be to “wear life like a loose coat.”  Don’t take everything so serious. Especially, we shouldn’t take ourselves so seriously. The point is growth and we don’t have to be all doom and gloom.

After all part of recovery is learning to enjoy life and with a purpose. (Man, I hope I am hearing myself, right now!)

In the latter part of the afternoon, a friend came over she cut my hair and did a wonderful job. I didn’t have to explain much. But even doing stuff like this is like trusting people. Learning to trust each other is a gift. The chance to be trusted is also a gift. The great thing is we all share when you really become part of, rather than just being around.

This evening was even more special as my therapist came for a one on one time. If you’re anything like me, you need all the help you can get through therapy. I received my 15-year coin of sobriety. It meant so much to me that he presented it. I cannot wait to take it to my gatherings to pass it around the tables.

This therapist I have saw some of the me that used to be. He has also seen me through the years go through valleys and mountain tops. Tonight, I just needed the reminder I wasn’t alone. No matter how old we get and even though we know we aren’t alone, we just sometimes need that reminder.

Now that I have written it all out, I can see I had reminders all day. I was never alone. I am grateful for that today. To Thine Own Self Be True.

Thanks for reading. This here’s Boxcar Mike over and out.

God Bless y’all !

 

 

 

Willing To Be a Ripple Brings Change About

nature water drops of water liquid

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Good Morning Everyone!

I am finally getting a post in again! Its so great to be able to share with you all my journey.

I have taken break from my regular reading but that will start again today. The past week I have been celebrating my 15 years of being clean and sober. I have been to all my regular gatherings around the tables.

I am just overwhelmed still by the natural structure the meetings have placed in my life.

I have so much to be thankful for.

The gatherings as I refer to them, are about being apart of and doing the deal. One of the gifts in sobriety today is being included. I also get to experience that fellowship time. Another is sharing with people in a general way and still a few, at gut level. I still tend to be guarded and at least I can recognize that today.

One important lesson I have learned in the past few weeks, but it did not hit home until tonight. That is when my willingness stops all the teachers disappear. They may show up as friends and all but man I learned I am heavy with the judgment. The doors slam with a clang when I start that crap.

The world is not all about me today. I often act like it is though. I even mentioned I was not a good example of sobriety and I do mean that. I am hoping restarting the willingness and really doing this deal, changes that.

I am also hoping for the people who aren’t good for me I continue the distance thing and start including more who are good for me. I need to get out of the driver’s seat and listen to some direction though.

The biggest thing for me and I think all people is letting go of the crap that doesn’t serve us. I’ve held on to a lot out of sentimental reasons. Wanting my fantasy back and not accepting people moved on and some have died. I have no control over that crap.

There’s been a lot of hurt I know I am in denial of, that I even created. It doesn’t matter if its unintentional. Trust me when I say, probably on some level it was intentional. That’s the truth.

Sometimes the truth hurts. That’s why in all honesty it has to be dealt with. We have to be hard on ourselves, but down the hammer. Beating ourselves up will never make it right and in fact its just false pride thinking we don’t have to face the real music as long as we continue beating ourselves up.

In California we’d have camp meetings around a fire. Someone would yell “get off the cross, we need the wood for the fire!” when one would start blubbering about all the crap they did. I used to think that was harsh. I thought it was harsh because, I was one of the ones blubbering.

Today I get to be a ripple if I am willing.

I have a page on my personal Facebook and my page is Boxcar Mike check me out on there https://www.facebook.com/BoxcarMike-1589704404503496 If you try to friend me on my personal time leave me a note in Boxcar Mike  otherwise I will consider it spam. If I don’t know you, I don’t know you. Also just give it a minute and like me.

I am doing a 30-day challenge of rewiring my brain of 3 things I am grateful for each day. I got the Grateful Dead playing “Ripple”.

Thank you all for reading! This is Boxcar Mike over and out!

God bless Y’all !