Part Two of Step Two, is being restored to sanity. It takes starting the root of Step Two to work through all of the rest of the steps in order to rightly relate ourselves to God.
It means clearing out all the junk so the Grace of God can fully enter us.
I had many times both drunk and dry where the living room furniture was flapped over or someone was seriously hurt due to the anger and rage, I was showing.
It’s been an insane way to live. What’s even crazier is while one may stay dry this is what is happening in the mind as a person white knuckle it. You’re miserable and the damage is still being done until true recovery begins.
Recovery can’t begin or at least it couldn’t until I decided who or what I was coming to believe in and being restored couldn’t happen until I rightly relate myself to God.
As I am picking up these steps and setting right the foundation, this is where I can learn to rightly relate myself to God. I can’t do it alone; however, it does take my own decision alone.
With the decision in place, I can begin action with direction.
Sometimes I think it’s easier to call ourselves crazy, but hard to accept we are in fact mentally ill. We have deemed crazy as fun and more of a daredevil inside us as harmless.
Let’s not be mistaken, our illness has taken us beyond harmless and in put us in some precarious and harmful positions. It’s not just us this has affected.
Unfortunately, our actions and decisions affected everyone around us.
Today I know I must change. In order to change means being willing to believe in a power greater than myself (God) can and will restore me to sanity.
For me personally, I have been signed into many hospitals, a few times willingly and few times not so willingly I have tried many of the medications out there.
Perhaps now is the time, taking the steps and taking direction means I have a fighting chance to stay sober and grow.
It’s all about getting honest and cleaning up the junk so that we may find the freedom we crave. This hardly even the beginning its just scratching the surface and part of an outline.
This decision finally starts with a prayer as we begin Step Three. This will be in the next couple of entries I write. I may write more on something else before I write on Step Three.
I don’t want to promise the very next entry yet. I usually become a liar by making a promise. But Maybe I will I have no idea. Each time I write it really feels like I am directed outside my wants.
- I am grateful for Step Two
- Iam grateful for a loving God as He may express Himself in and through my life if and when I allow Him to.
- I am grateful for the chance to get better each day.
- I am grateful for sharing with others and getting to listen to others.
- I am grateful for people who tell me the truth today.
- I am grateful to get to be of service especially when I have no clue. It keeps my head at the right size.
- I am grateful I can ask others for help.
- I am grateful I am not a doormat today. I can be assertive.
This has been another blog post entry by Boxcar Mike Thanks for reading! Over and Out!
God Bless Y’all Everybody!