Photograph By: Nicate Lee @ unsplash.com
It’s great to be back writing and I admit I owe two or three days to my blog here. Life gets so busy and I get tired easily. With my thinking, I seem to get on the merry-go-around, and never seem to quite make the ride come to a full stop. All it really takes is deciding and taking the action to lay down the stuff that seems to keep rolling around in our heads.
So much time gets stolen from staying one the merry-go-around. Did I mention precious time?
I don’t know about you, but I seem to waste too much time on stuff that doesn’t matter and won’t matter a hundred years from now. I am on this journey to change my life and the pattern in my thinking.
I am leading this post right back to the book and the Twelve Steps. I mentioned in my last post. I really believe this is all part of that admission and it’s up to me to get off of the merry-go-around. It’s all in step one of admitting I have a problem. This same problem is what kept me active in my disease for many years. The bottom line is that, it is insanity.
I won’t be perfect here on this earth. I know I can’t do one single thing perfect. But all that is asked of me is again, the honesty, open mindedness, and willingness. I can have progress today, if I choose it. To do otherwise and have everything eat my lunch, is a soul sickness. I’d much rather spread hope than the sickness of my soul.
Until the work is done on the inside, I cannot transmit something I don’t have to others. But taking this journey together is different. I can share my hope along the way.
I will always say, we cannot do this thing alone. It takes surrounding ourselves with people who have been there, just like we are, or like I am. I believe there’s more than enough evidence here for my admission of insanity. Goodness, enough people have seen me in action with insanity. Let me just say that is not flattering myself either or anything to boast about.
I do believe in a power greater than myself. I believe in God as I understand God, and also as I don’t understand God. That’s my thing of course and I am not here to debate about if there a God or not a God.
I believe that I can be restored to sanity. I believe that I want sanity today. I do believe there are more spiritual experiences ahead. I do believe most will be still of the educational variety. The reason I believe that, is because I believe it is always a temptation to be too high and mighty.
If you prefer the word ego would be a great fit here. I n my earliest days of getting clean and sober ego was defines as edging God out. I have done that plenty in my walk.
Today I want my recovery to be more progressive than my disease. I can’t, He can, I think I’ll let Him.
Daily 3 things grateful for in 21 days to rewire our brain Day5:
- I am grateful for my closed mouth friends
- I am grateful for texting with my mom
- I am grateful for rides to the meetings I go to and before and after meetings
Thank you for reading! This has been another blogpost entry from BoxcarMike! God Bless Everybody!